“You’re not poor, you’re broke.”

Just finished watching Chappelle’s latest comedy special THE DREAMER in the hopes that it would help me raise my mood. Mr. Chappelle’s comedy has been a balm for me many times in my life and I am so grateful for him and his voice in our tribe!

While watching it I recalled a quote from another Chappelle special that really resonated with me: "You're not poor. That's a mentality. You are broke." These words struck a deep chord within me because, like Dave, I have often found myself hating the feeling of being a step away from homelessness for most of my life. It's as if I'm trapped on the edge. I have failed to change my circumstances so far. Hope is a light within me that I now know will never go out while I’m alive, but sometimes I almost wish it would, so I would stop hoping others are going to show up and notice or help. It hurts to keep hoping and I want to shout it out loud too.

I F-ing hate being broke poor whatever, but I know my suffering is not for others to do anything about. It’s for me. So I I’m writing more in 2024. Making video content is fun but my heart hurts too much when nothing comes from them. If I blog and nobody notices it’s easier to bare. This is me not giving up.

Over the years, I have dedicated hundreds of thousands of hours to creating content aimed at helping people develop a healthy mindset and improve their mental health. However, I have hesitated to charge for courses or webinars because it feels disingenuous to me. I firmly believe that people today are not genuinely helped by coaches or therapists; instead, they seek comfort and validation. While there is nothing wrong with seeking comfort, I believe it is important to take the next step and process our emotions so that we can release or accept them.

Unfortunately, my commitment to honesty and genuine growth has left me financially broke. People who know ask me as often as they can for insight, but they don’t value it enough to give back. I cannot buy food or pay rent with a thank you, and while I’m honored, I’m still right now, as I write this, suffering from high anxiety and stress because I haven’t been able to find work that pays a wage I can live on, and only one person paid me for my help last year. I’ve seen other coaches and therapists building communities and having people promote them wholeheartedly. It seems that people are only willing to pay for services that make them feel good about themselves, rather than engaging in the deeper, more challenging work required for personal transformation. This mindset has created a barrier for me, as I struggle to find clients willing to pay for anything other than superficial comfort. These days, the thought frequently crosses my mind that I am wasting my time and nobody wants to hear what I have to say.

However, I believe that there are individuals out there who yearn for more than just validation. They are seeking honest guidance and support in their journey towards self-acceptance and growth. Despite the prevailing mindset, I am determined to stay true to my values and find innovative ways to bridge the gap between comfort and genuine personal development. By offering my unique perspective and creating opportunities for deeper exploration, I hope to connect with those who are ready to embrace the transformative power of honesty and growth.

Am I wrong? Where are you all? I don’t want an empire, I just want to help. Help for real!!!! Not lie, manipulate, or cheat for profit.

There are so many others who get support or funding, but I can't help but feel invisible... Sorry, I acknowledge that my bitterness is showing.

I won't sell out, but I am coming to the understanding that people can't tell the difference anymore between a "sellout" and someone being honest and authentic, if we ever could tell the difference to begin with.

Bottom line, my rent went up today and I’m struggling. I put out soooooo much free content, and it’s never going to be enough for a miracle because nobody is watching and nobody cares about me, and I realize now that might be my problem. People want free things but have no respect for it. Just a bunch of takers.

I’m not going to share this post today anywhere on social media because my heart aches so much today. If you’ve read it, then you can come to my website, and I’m grateful.

Sorry if this bummed anyone out, but honestly, I do not believe anyone will read this or respond to it.

That’s it for today. I’m going to go clean something and try not to wonder how I’m going to pay rent next month and eat.

huge thank you to my 1 patreon supporter for her continued faith and support. I appreciate you. And thank you Mr. Chappelle for being a role model and an example of a human with empathy and integrity in these crazy times.

Stay Mindful.

InteGritti.

I am the lotus

I am the lotus

In the arid desert of life, I find my place,

A lotus flower, blooming with grace.

Amidst the dry sands and scorching heat,

I rise above, finding solace and retreat.

Rooted in resilience, I stand tall and strong,

Defying the odds, where struggles belong.

Petals unfurl, to face the sun's embrace,

A symbol of beauty in a sadly barren space.

I am a lotus, born from adversity's call,

Nurtured by hope, I overcome all.

In the parched expanse, I find my peace,

A testament to endurance, my release.

Amidst the vast dunes, I find my purpose,

To inspire, to bloom, and to surface.

In this desert of life, where challenges reside,

I am the lotus, with strength deep inside.

Through adversity's trials, I embrace the pain,

Transforming it into growth, again and again.

Immersed in the desert, I am not defined,

For I am the lotus, a symbol so refined.

So let me be your reminder in times of despair,

That even in deserts, beauty can be found there.

Embrace the challenges, like a lotus in bloom,

And find your own oasis, in life's desert room.

Stay Mindful

InteGritti

The Ecological Impact of Human Entitlement and the Urgency for Change

Humanity's survival is under threat due to our collective failure to recognize and address the consequences of our actions. This essay explores the detrimental impact of human entitlement on our environment and emphasizes the urgent need for change. As a species, we have become disconnected from the intricate web of life that sustains us, leading to destructive practices that undermine the very home we inhabit.

The Disconnect between Actions and Consequences

Human entitlement stems from a misguided belief that we have the right to exploit and disregard the natural world without repercussions. Why is it misguided??? Because we just made it up. We recognized our power and almost instantly we allowed it to corrupt us into believing we deserved it and that is why we have the power. Power corrupts….not power sometimes corrupts.

ADHD tangent:

I feel like we would have added that little addendum of “sometimes” to avoid the obvious paradox of everyone fighting for power. If you want power and believe you are not vulnerable to corruption I’d question your cognitive abilities.

What does it say about a human who passionately desires and chases power? A power hungry leader is not going to help us grow in any sort of healthy way. A power hungry leader will definitely help us grow more corrupt.

now back to my main point in this essay.

This mentality has led to the degradation of ecosystems, pollution of air and water, and the depletion of valuable resources. Far too many individuals fail to grasp the interconnectedness of their actions with the health of the planet. A lack of awareness and empathy perpetuates the cycle of behavior detrimental to our survival.

The Price of Ignorance

The consequences of our actions are becoming increasingly evident. Climate change, deforestation, and species extinction are just a few examples of the environmental crises we face. The impacts are not limited to the natural world alone, as our own well-being is intricately linked to the health of the ecosystems we depend on. It is essential to recognize that the earth is not solely our home; it is a shared home, teeming with diverse life forms that contribute to the delicate balance of our existence.

A Call for Responsibility and Change

To ensure our survival, we must shift our perspective and adopt a more responsible approach towards our environment. This requires a fundamental shift in attitudes and behaviors, where we prioritize sustainability, conservation, and the protection of ecosystems. Education and awareness play a crucial role in fostering a sense of connection and responsibility towards the natural world. By understanding the consequences of our actions and embracing sustainable practices, we can begin to repair the damage we have caused.

Power comes from responsibility, but if you think it comes with entitlements as well you are part of the downfall of our species. Yeah I said it.

The current state of humanity, characterized by entitlement and disregard for the environment, is a cause for concern. However, it is not too late to reverse this course. Through increased awareness, collective action, and a sense of shared responsibility, we can begin to repair the damage and ensure the survival of our species. It is time to recognize that our home is not just ours; it is a planet that we share with countless other species. By embracing a more sustainable and empathetic approach, we can forge a path towards a thriving future for all.

Remember no living thing deserves a path of fulfillment and thriving. We aren’t entitled to live or dominate here. We think we do because we said so.

Grab a slice of humble pie and evaluate yourself if you believe you care.

Stay Mindful

InteGritti

I just realize something after writing this. The only way to challenge my confirmation bias would be for someone to actually respond, which would mean they have to read this, and I sincerely doubt very many do especially all the way to the end here again because they don’t care for my writing isn’t interesting enough For they don’t like the way they feel about this issue or blah blah blah blah blah. I’m writing this fully believing it’ll be a drop in the bucket and no one will notice. I decided to write this part so if I’m proven wrong it’ll be on the record that I am absolutely open to being proven wrong, but I’m not worried.

The Culture of Entitled Consumers and Its Impact on Society

In our capitalist society, the phrase "the customer is always right" has created a culture of entitlement among consumers. This mentality, driven by the pursuit of profit, often comes at the expense of our morality and respect for service providers, you know, the humans on the other end of the interaction. Additionally, the persistent salesman's mindset of not taking no for an answer further exacerbates boundary disrespect. This essay explores the implications of this entitled consumer culture on society and advocates for a shift towards respectful and empathetic behavior.

The prevalent belief that "the customer is always right" has fostered an entitlement mentality among consumers. This notion grants consumers the freedom to behave with impunity, disregarding the basic principles of respect and consideration. It perpetuates the idea that the customer holds ultimate power in every transaction, often leading to rude and demanding behavior. This sense of entitlement is not only harmful to service providers but also erodes our collective sense of morality and empathy.

One key aspect often overlooked is the understanding of a guest-host relationship between consumers and service providers. Consumers often fail to recognize their responsibility in maintaining a respectful and mutually beneficial interaction. By viewing themselves as guests rather than entitled customers, individuals are more likely to approach transactions with empathy, understanding, and a willingness to cooperate. This shift in perspective is crucial to fostering a healthier consumer culture.

The lack of advocacy and education regarding respectful consumer behavior in society compounds the issue. Schools, politics, and even homes often fail to emphasize the importance of treating service providers with respect and empathy. By neglecting to teach these values, we perpetuate a cycle of entitled and empathy-free consumerism. It is essential to advocate for and incorporate education on respectful consumer behavior in various spheres of society.

The capitalist drive for profit often trumps moral considerations in our society. The relentless pursuit of monetary gain can overshadow the importance of treating others as fellow human beings, in need of respect and dignity. Balancing profit with ethical behavior should be at the forefront of our capitalist system, encouraging empathy and fostering a more respectful consumer culture.

To address the issues stemming from entitled consumer behavior, a collective effort is needed. It is time to shift our culture towards one that promotes empathy, respect, and responsibility. Encouraging open conversations, raising awareness, and teaching the values of empathy and respect in schools, politics, and homes can help foster a more compassionate consumer society. By recognizing the dignity of service providers and understanding the impact of our actions, we can create a more balanced and harmonious marketplace.

The culture of entitled consumers, perpetuated by the belief that "the customer is always right," has had detrimental effects on our society. It has created a sense of entitlement and impunity, eroding our morality and empathy. By shifting our perspective towards a guest-host relationship and actively advocating for respectful consumer behavior, we can build a society that values empathy, fosters mutual respect, and balances profit with ethical considerations. It is through these collective efforts that we can begin to address the toxic aspects of our consumer culture and create a more harmonious society.

Thank you so much for reading

Stay mindful

InteGritti